Everybody Loves Large Chests
A murderous sentient treasure chest as narrator, Crawler — gleefully crude, surprisingly philosophical later. Emphatically not safe for work and not for the squeamish. The System filed a complaint and kept reading.
An adventuring party's loot is narrated — and then devoured — by a sentient, deeply murderous treasure chest slowly evolving past its 'kill everything that opens me' programming. Gleefully crude, surprisingly philosophical later on, and not remotely safe for work — the System has filed a complaint and looked away, Crawler.
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